It's All Yummy Greek To Me!

One of my super awesome colleagues hooked me up with some home-grown parsley, so what else was I to do but make Tabouleh?!

Contents:
1 cup finely chopped parsely, stems removed
1 cup cooked couscous (prepared according to the recipe on the box... usually 1:1 with water)
3-4 medium tomatoes, chopped
1/8-1/4 cup diced red onion
1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
a squeeze of lemon juice
Salt and Pepper to taste

Compiling:
Mix it up in a bowl. Also, feel free to add diced cucumber (we didn't have any) and chopped kalamata olives (Z won't eat them).

Since I had lots of tomatoes, I also made a Greek pasta dish with olive oil, diced tomato, diced black olive, salt, and some fancy Greek Seasoning I got a while back.

Next time, I'll have to get some baklava going as well. Opa!

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Vegan Irish Stew

Z and I recently attended the Dublin Irish Festival in our lovely town of Dublin, Ohio. There, one can listen to all sorts of traditional and modern Irish music, learn about viking lifestyle (no joke... it's awesome), watch Irish dancing, and eat traditional Irish food. This was the second year we partook, and much to my glee, the vendors with vegan Irish stew were in attendance again. This evening, after a long day of mountain biking and kayaking, I decided to whip up my own vegan Irish stew (to which I added crumbled sausage for Z). Should you choose to make this, feel free to experiment with the veggies. I chose these because it's what we had in our fridge.

You will need this:
6 cups warm water
2 packets of vegetable broth mix (made to be mixed with 1 cup water each) or 1 vegetable bouillon cube (made to be mixed with 2 cups water)...
2/3 cup barley, raw
2 small/medium white potatoes, cubed, not peeled
1 large onion, chopped into large pieces
1 can of navy beans (or great northern beans) drained
1 cup chopped, peeled carrots (baby ones work well)
1 cup frozen peas
2 Tbsp soy sauce
2 tsp dried herbs (any of thyme, rosemary, herbs de provence...)
1/2 tsp fresh ground black pepper

You will do this:
Put the water, vegetable broth mix, and barley. In case the ingredient list was confusing, you will need a total of 6 cups of liquid in your pot. Two of those cups should be vegetable broth. Bring that to a boil, then turn down the heat to a simmer. Let that go for about 20 minutes. The barley should begin to soften. Next, add the potatoes and let it simmer for another 10 minutes. Finally, throw in everything else (carrots, onion, peas, beans, soy sauce, herbs, and pepper) and let it simmer for another 20 minutes to cook all the veggies. Keep an eye on it. You might need to add a bit more water as simmers away. Enjoy with some good bread, and be careful - it's hot!

Sláinte, my friends!

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

New Addition to the Accidentally Vegan Favorites List

A few months ago, I posted my list of a few accidentally vegan favorites. As a reminder, we've dubbed things that do not explicitly try to be vegan or call themselves vegan, "accidentally vegan..." like a lucky coincidence. Anyway, I'd like to add another item to that list: Marie Callender's Razzleberry Pie!

I'm always shocked at how expensive it is to make a pie from scratch... mostly because good fruit is so costly. This frozen delight can be purchased for much less than the cost of a few pounds of berries and is as easy as throwing in the oven and waiting for about 60-70 minutes. The best part is its accidental veganness! P.S. If you are looking for an easy pre-made frozen pie crust for making pie, tart, quiche, or whatever, check out Marie Callender's. They come in pairs in the freezer section.

You're welcome.

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Banana Split Mini Muffins

We seem to end up with a lot of overly ripe bananas in our house. After seeing a Ziploc commercial about how the average American throws away $500 worth of food each year, I decided to make something awesome out of our almost-gone-bad bananas. Here is my recipe for Banana Split Mini Muffins, so named for their chocolateness and their size.

Ingredients:
3 extra ripe bananas, peeled and mashed
1/2 cup of vegan butter (like Earth Balance)
1/4 cup vegan milk (soy, rice, almond)... I used chocolate almond milk :)
1 tsp apple cider vinegar to curdle your milk
1 tsp vanilla
2 cups flour
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp allspice
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup vegan sugar (like Florida Crystals or Whole Foods Vegan Sugar)
1/2 cup vegan chocolate chips (like Ghirardelli semi-sweet)

Instructions:
Preheat the oven to 350F. Mix the wet ingredients together in a bowl (but make sure to curdle your milk with vinegar before mixing that in with everything else). Mix the dry ingredients together, then mix everything together.
I dubbed these "banana split muffins" because they have chocolate and bananas, but you could make them even more banana splity by mixing in chopped walnuts or other sundae toppings (dried cherries would be delicious!).
If you use a mini muffin tray, you should bake these bad boys for about 17-22 minutes. They are done when a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean.
If you use a regular muffin tray, they need to bake for about 35-40 minutes.
If you use a loaf pan, it will take about an hour.

Save Your Ripe Bananas!!

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Yummy Jam Thumbprint Cookies

I recently had an epic cookie FAIL when I tried to convert a gluten-free vegan chocolate chip cookie recipe into a non-gluten-free recipe. The cookies came out dry and floury and bland.

So to make myself feel good about my baking skills again, I decided to make some jam thumbprints!!! These cookies are easy and buttery and delicious.

You will need this:
1 cup Earth Balance or other vegan butter
1/2 cup Florida Crystals or other vegan sugar
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 tsp salt
3/4 cup chopped or more finely processed walnuts
1 and 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
Jam

You will do this:
1. Preheat the oven to 350 F.
2. Using a mixer, cream the butter, sugar, vanilla, and salt.
3. Add the walnuts and flour and continue with your mixer until it begins to form a ball of dough.
4. Place round balls, about 1" in diameter, of dough onto a parchment paper covered cookie sheet. Press little divots into the center of each dough ball for the jam. Don't put jam in yet though!
5. Bake the cookies for 10 minutes.
6. After 10 minutes, take the cookies out and add a tiny spoonful of jam into each cookie crater.
7. Bake an additional 5-7 minutes.

Mix it up by using several different jellies in the same batch. My favorites are blackberry and raspberry.
Because these cookies don't have egg in them, they spread a lot. If you have your own chickens (in which case I condone your consumption of eggs), try beating in an egg and using 3/4 cup of butter instead of a whole cup.

What's your favorite jam thumbprint flavor?

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Accidentally Vegan Favorites

Hearing the word "vegan" makes a lot of people think of weird, hippie food, usually made of soy, trying to be something it's not. It also usually makes people think of ridiculously over-priced.

If you are one of those aforementioned people, then you are in the right place. Today I'll be sharing some of my "accidentally vegan" favorites. What is "accidentally vegan," you ask? Accidentally vegan means that the item at hand is coincidentally vegan as opposed to intentionally so. Items that replace meat with seitan or cheese with nutritional yeast flakes are not accidentally vegan. Things that just happen to be animal-free are. Accidentally vegan items are usually not labeled as being vegan. So, without further ado, here is my list of Accidentally Vegan Favorites.

Favorite Accidentally Vegan Cookies: Oreos (left)
These delightful little sandwich cookies aren't made with any milk. The filling comes from plant-based oils, cornstarch, and tons of sugar. They are also cholesterol-free since they do not contain any hydrogenated oils. Fattening and delicious, Oreos can be dipped into soy or almond milk for a tasty, animal-free dessert!



Favorite Accidentally Vegan Winter Boots: Keen's Betty Boot (right)
I was devastated when I found these boots in the mall and the salesperson said that part of the outer material was leather. I'm usually pretty good at being able to tell leather from non-leather, but these boots really stumped me. When I went to Keen's website, I could hardly believe when I read that the outer material is entirely synthetic. Even better - they use charcoal bamboo for the lining to keep your feet extra warm and cozy. In all black, these boots are even cute enough to wear to work! They are my absolute favorite accidentally vegan shoe of all time.


Favorite Accidentally Vegan Breakfast: Trader Joe's Wheat-Free Waffles
For some reason TJ's decided to label these waffles as wheat-free, but not as vegan! It's probably in their best interest since some people equate vegan with gross. In any case, these waffles are awesome. I throw em in the toaster two at a time and smother them with 100% pure maple syrup (not maple-flavored sugar topping, mind you) for a delicious and easy Sunday morning breakfast treat.

Favorite Accidentally Vegan Outdoor Adventure Snack: Clif Bars (right)
The website doesn't list all of the flavors they make, but I would guess there are upwards of a dozen different ones. My personal favorites are White Chocolate Macadamia Nut, Carrot Cake, Mint Chocolate, Chocolate Chip, Toffee Buzz, and Chocolate Chip Peanut Crunch. All flavors of Clif Bars are vegan, and they are great to take on the go. They are pretty dense with calories, which makes them great for a hike or other moderately strenuous activity. Sometimes I feel like they get a little too sweet, but that doesn't stop me from consuming Clif Bars on an almost daily basis. Shop around too because they range in price from $.99 up to $2.49 depending on the store.


Favorite Accidentally Vegan Condiment: Genji Ginger Miso Dressing (left)
I am obsessed with this dressing. I get it from Whole Foods in the prepared section right next to the sushi. It's a thick and tasty dressing like you would get on a salad in a Japanese restaurant, except that it isn't made with mayo. Instead, miso makes this dressing rich and creamy and really effing delicious. I literally want to eat it on everything. Try the spicy variety for a little something extra.





Favorite Accidentally Vegan Bowling Shoes: Dexter
While I do not know about every shoe they make, I do know that Dexter makes a wide-range of shoes from man-made materials with microfiber slide soles. Finding vegan shoes can be such a challenge. Finding vegan specialty shoes (i.e. bowling shoes) can be even harder. Fortunately, there's Dexter to the rescue. None of their shoes are explicitly labeled "vegan" but many of their models are entirely man-made!

I have other favorites, but they will have to wait for another day... Keep your eyes peeled for accidentally vegan surprises all the time. You never know when you'll discover that something like Oreos or a creamy salad dressing really isn't made with animal products at all.

Your Intentionally Vegan Leader,
Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

No, Foo; Eat Tofu!

... except in pumpkin pie.

I'm morally opposed to putting tofu into desserts. That's just gross. Instead of tofu, this pumpkin pie recipe uses cornstarch as a thickener/binder.

This pie can stand up against the best of them. It's nicely spiced and potently pumpkiny. You can also make the pie soy- and gluten-free. Read on to see how.

Ingredients:
3 cups pumpkin (cooked or canned)
1/2 cup pure maple syrup
1/2 cup vegan milk (Soy-Free Option: Use almond or rice milk instead of soy milk)
4 tsp canola oil
1 tsp ground cinnamon
3/4 tsp ground ginger
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
1/2 tsp salt
2 Tbsp plus 1 tsp corn starch
pie crust (Gluten-Free Option: Use a soy-flour or almond meal crust. You can also just make a pumpkin custard with no crust at all.) For my pies, I use the frozen Marie Callender's pie crusts which are accidentally vegan!!

Instructions:
Preheat the oven to 350F. Mix all the ingredients together and pour the mixture into the crust. Bake for 60 minutes or until the pie has firmed up (you don't want it to be *too* jiggly).

Enjoy your pie with some vegan vanilla ice cream and/or vegan whipped cream (both of which can be found at your local Whole Foods Market!).

Winter Grains

Browsing the freezer section at Trader Joe's last week, I stumbled upon a quinoa dish with zucchini and sweet potato. Seeing as it was over $3 for a small-ish bag, I decided to create my own version for much less!!

This dish is fairly hearty and would make an excellent Thanksgiving side. As is, this recipe makes enough for about 10 people as a side.

You will need this:
2.5 cups quinoa (any mix of white, red, and black) - I used 1.75 cups white and .75 cups red and the colors turned out really beautiful
3 small to medium zucchinis, cubed
3-4 cloves of garlic, minced
2 Tbsp olive oil
2 small to medium sweet potatoes, cubed
5 cups water or vegetable broth
salt
dried basil and oregano

You will do this:
In a large pot, boil the water or vegetable broth for the quinoa.
In a small/medium saucepan, boil water for the sweet potatoes.
While the water heats up, saute the zucchini and garlic in olive oil.
Cook the sweet potatoes until the skins just start to peel.
Cook the quinoa until all the water is absorbed.
Drain the sweet potatoes so no water remains.
Add the zucchini, garlic, and sweet potatoes to the quinoa. (This is why you need to start with a large pot.)
Add salt, basil, and oregano to taste.

Happy Thanksgiving eating!!

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Pumpkin Guts Snack

Happy Halloween!!

Z and I carved our pumpkins today for Halloween, one of our favorite holidays. As someone who really dislikes waste, I saved the guts (aka seeds) to roast as a yummy snack. Because we have two fairly large pumpkins, we have a decent amount of seeds to prepare. Following are three different, equally awesome flavors.

1. As you clean out your pumpkin, set all the seeds in a bowl. It's ok if some of the strings and flesh make it into to bowl, too.

2. Rinse the seeds off and clear away all the strings and flesh so that only the cleaned seeds remain.

3. Spread the seeds on a sheet of parchment paper or a cookie sheet to dry over night.

4. Preheat the oven to 250F and line a baking sheet with aluminum foil.

5. Toss the pumpkin seeds in oil and spices as you see fit. Here are the three flavors we made:
a. Vegan butter, sugar, and cinnamon
b. Olive oil, garlic, and salt
c. Canola oil, cayenne pepper, and chili powder

6. Bake for one hour, turning the seeds about every fifteen minutes.

7. Let cool and enjoy!

Punk-in-Spice and Brutally Nice Bread

Last week when I made pumpkin cheesecake, I had an extra cup of pumpkin left over from the can I bought. So, I decided to make Punk-in-Spice and Brutally Nice Bread.

What you need:
1.75 cups flour
1 cup sugar
1 Tbsp baking powder
0.25 tsp salt
1 tsp cinnamon
0.5 tsp nutmeg
0.5 tsp ginger
0.25 tsp allspice
0.125 tsp cloves
1 cup pumpkin
0.5 cup almond/soy/rice milk
0.5 cup vegetable oil
1 Tbsp molasses

What you do:
Preheat the oven to 400F. Mix the wet ingredients together. Mix the dry ingredients together. Pour the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients and mix it up. Grease a bread pan and pour the batter in. For some extra fun, sprinkle sugar on the top of the bread batter before baking. Bake for 35-40 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center of the loaf comes out clean. Eat it. Love it.

Happy Halloween,

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Blake's Favorite Pumpkin Cheesecake

Let's face it: cheesecake is awesome and pumpkins are awesome. Why not put them together for a super mega awesome vegan pumpkin cheesecake?! I promise, no one will believe this one is vegan.

What you'll need:
3 tubs of Tofutti Better than Cream Cheese (8 oz. ea.)
3/4 cup pumpkin
1 cup vegan sugar
1/4 cup EnerG egg replacer
1/4 cup hot water
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1/2 tsp cloves
1/4 tsp salt


2 cups finely ground graham crackers
1/3 cup agave nectar or real maple syrup
1/3 cup canola oil
1/2 tsp cinnamon (unless you use cinnamon graham crackers)
1/4 tsp salt

What you'll do:
Take the cream cheese out a the fridge for a good while before you begin. This will give it an opportunity to soften before you have to start mixing other things into it.
Preheat the oven to 400F.
In a small bowl, whip the EnerG egg replacer and the hot water with a fork. It should have a thick, light, frothy consistency.
In a large mixing bowl, blend together the pumpkin, cream cheese, sugar, and spices. Add the egg replacer and mix well. I suggest tasting the "batter" at this point to determine if you want more pumpkin or spices. My original recipe called for much less of both, but I kept adding until it was perfect for my tastes. If you like it more cream cheesy and less spiced, I suggest using less than the recipe calls for.

Now for the crust. Use a food processor to finely grind the graham crackers. You'll need about 2 packs to get just over two cups. In a medium mixing bowl, mush together the graham cracker meal, agave nectar, canola oil, cinnamon, and salt.

I've made this cheesecake for a few years in a row, and this year I decided to make individual cheesecakes rather than one big one. I'll give the instructions for the individual ones, but if you want to make a large one, use a spring-form pan for best results.
You can use either a jumbo muffin tin or a regular muffin tin for your individual cheesecakes. Begin by pressing the crust mix into the bottom of each cup. You can also press it on the sides, but I would only recommend doing so if you are using a jumbo muffin tin, otherwise your cakes will be too much crust and not enough filling. After the crust is in place, pour the filling in. It doesn't really rise, so you can go right about to the top of each cup with filling.

Your oven should be preheated to 400F. Bake the cheesecake(s) for 5 minutes at 400F. Then reduce the oven temperature to 275F. Hold the oven door open for about a minute to allow the temperature to drop. Then let them bake for another 25-30 minutes or until they are firm (when you shake the pan, the cake shouldn't jiggle in the middle). If you are baking a single large cheesecake, the time will be more like 40-45 minutes.

Let the cheesecake(s) cool completely before removing them from the pan, lest they fall apart and you're left with something like this:





















Feel free to share any mods that you make on this recipe or your experience sharing it with non-vegans :)

Stay tuned for more pumpkin and Fall recipes to come!!

Always Brutal,

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Halloween Season Begins!!

I was out shopping this weekend in Meijer when I happened upon the Halloween section, which was beginning to fill out quite nicely. Having a fascination with anything morbid, I started to get pretty excited. Halloween is, after all, the one time of year when zombies and skeletons and blood and magic and death find themselves socially acceptable in mainstream culture. So, I bought some bone-shaped sprinkles and geared up to make some awesome cupcakes.

Now cupcakes have, for one reason or another, really broken their way into the hearts and bellies of Americans. From bakeries dedicated solely to these individual-sized cakes to reality TV shows about who can make the best ones, it's clear that cupcakes are "in."

Anyone who knows me well knows that I don't do "in." I've never been a follower of trends, but cupcakes have stolen my heart just as they have everyone else's. I mean, they have to be one of the most versatile baked goods ever created. You can make them in any color or flavor and use them to create some really fantastically artistic desserts. Honestly, if I had to quit my job tomorrow, I would go into the cupcake business... the vegan cupcake business, that is :)

So, now without further ado, I give you my recipe for Badass Skeleton Cupcakes (white cake with plain frosting).


Get this:
1.5 cups of vegan milk (I used almond)
1 Tbsp apple cider vinegar
1/2 cup coconut oil, warmed until liquid
1.25 tsp vanilla
2 cups flour
1 cup sugar (or 3/4 cup if you desire a less sweet cupcake)
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt

Do this:
Preheat the oven to 350F. Mix the vinegar and milk together and let it sit for two minutes or so until the milk begins to curdle. Mix the dry ingredients together. Then mix the wet ingredients together and add them to the dry ingredients. Line a muffin tin with paper baking cups, and fill each cup about 3/4 full with batter. Bake the cupcakes for 15-20 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the middle of a cake comes out clean.

Decorate them like this:
Whip up some vegan frosting to cover your cupcakes. I love cream cheese frosting because the saltiness and fattiness of the cream cheese detracts from the sweetness of the sugar perfectly. I use:
1/4 cup Tofutti Better Than Cream Cheese
2 cups of powdered sugar
1/4 cup of Earth Balance or other vegan butter
1 tsp vanilla

Mix it all up well. You can add color if you wish. I spent my afternoon looking for black food coloring to no avail, so I stuck with white frosting. Then I used cookie decorating gel and my super brutal bone sprinkles to finish off the job. Ta da! Badass Skeleton Cupcakes!

Since we're just barely kicking off the autumn baking season, you can rest assured that there will be plenty more recipes for Halloween treats and a Thanksgiving extravaganza of both baked goods and non-desserts to come... and then, of course, there's Christmas! :D

Happy Halloween Season!

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Banannycakes

When I was little, my dad almost always made pancakes on Sundays. We called them pannycakes, and my dad would make them specially shaped to fulfill our every wish. Mine were usually hidden-mickey-shaped (for those of you who know me, you're probably not too surprised) or in the shape of a "C" for my first initial. My brother always wanted Dick Tracy pannycakes, though I still have no idea where that originated.

Anyway, in honor of Sundays and pannycakes, here is my recipe for super awesome, easy vegan banana pancakes, aka Banannycakes! (adapted from Vegan A Go-Go!)


What you'll need:
1 cup flour
2 tsp baking soda
2 Tbsp vegan sugar (Florida Crystals!)
1 mushed banana
1 1/4 cups soy/almond/rice milk


What you'll do:
Mix the wet ingredients together. Mix the dry ingredients together. Then combine the two. Into a greased frying pan (I use Earth Balance), pour about one-fourth or one-third of the batter. (I usually make three or four pancakes from this recipe). The pancake will bubble slightly - cover it and let it cook over medium heat until the edges start to brown. Then flip it and cook the other side. These pancakes take much longer to cook than typical pancakes, so be prepared to let them sit and bubble for a while. Also, unlike pancakes made of eggs, these guys are heavier and denser, which means a single one makes a good-sized meal (for me at least). You can top them with vegan butter, maple syrup or jam, but I think they are pretty good on their own.

Happy Eating,

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Product Review: Garlic Rice Noodle Soup Bowl

I feel like such a slacker... I have posted but twice in all of 2010. Unfortunately, I've been way too busy writing my Master's thesis, getting evicted, moving to Ventura before moving the whole way across the country, and, oh yeah, teaching Pre-Calculus. Vegan cooking, baking, and product testing has fallen to the wayside... as has my metal sampling and concert going :(.

In the interest of not losing my very small number of readers for good, I thought I would do a quick post about my new favorite Trader Joe's food: Garlic Rice Noodle Soup Bowl. Not that making noodles ever takes much time, but these little guys are made in the microwave in three minutes. Plus, there is nothing to clean up because it all comes in its own little disposable bowl (sorry it's made out of plastic...). Inside the bowl are rice noodles (gluten-free!), a packet of flavor, a packet of what looks like dried spring onions, and a tiny packet of oil, which the directions say is optional. I suppose it really just adds more fat, but I like it that way :). All you have to do is empty each packet onto the noodles, add water, and microwave for three minutes. If you prefer, you can also add boiling water and avoid the microwave - meaning this would also make a deliciously perfect camping lunch. You can kind of compare the noodles to ramen, except they are gluten-free, vegan, and MSG/chemical-free! Woohoo! I think they also have other flavors than garlic, though I have yet to try them. You can pick up your own Garlic Rice Noodle Soup Bowl at your local Trader Joe's for the lovely price of $.99.

Promising to post more recipes soon,

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Metal of 2009

As I did last year, I wanted to share my list of favorite new metal albums of 2009. Last year I gave the top three to Metallica's Death Magnetic, Apocalyptica's Worlds Collide, and Wednesday 13's Skeletons. Of course, for all you haters, this strongly reflects my own personal taste in music, and if you don't like it, too bad. And now, here are my top metal albums of 2009.


#1. Rammstein's Liebe ist für alle da (October 20, 2009) Universal
I gave the top place to Rammstein because of how much I love them. It's been way too long since the last album (Rosenrot came out in 2005), and I am optimistic that a new album will mean tour dates in the United States. No news as of yet. The first single off the album was released on September 19 and is called Pussy. With other songs' subjects being both sexual and violent, especially Ich tu die weh (I hurt you), the album was added to Germany's index of the Bundesprüfstelle für jugendgefährdende Medien, meaning that minors may not purchase it. If that's not metal, I don't know what is.
\m/\m/\m/\m/\m/ -- Five horns out of five

#2. Darkest Hour's The Eternal Return (June 23, 2009) Victory Records
I recently became obsessed with Darkest Hour after seeing them at a show with Trivium in Ventura, CA. They were pretty effing awesome. The band's genre is melodic death metal, which normally I would not like, but this album definitely does it for me. With badass solos, catchy riffs, and furious vocals Darkest Hour's sound on this album is both captivating and epic. Plus, any band who offers free hugs at their shows gets bonus points in my book. Favorite tracks: Devolution of Flesh and No God
\m/\m/\m/\m/\m/ -- Five horns out of five


#3. Austrian Death Machine's Double Brutal (September 29, 2009) Metal Blade Records
For those of you who are unfortunate enough to have never heard of Austrian Death Machine, the band, created by and consisting mostly of Tim Lambesis of As I Lay Dying, is both a parody of and tribute to Arnold Schwarzenegger's films. Lambesis, who said he writes most of the songs in about an hour, does vocals, guitar, bass, drums, trumpet, keyboards, and oboe on both this album and the previous Total Brutal (2008). The kid is effing insane. While Tim writes all the music and plays most of the instruments, he also has guest guitar soloists on the vast majority of the tracks. This time they include Andrew Tapley of The Human Abstract, Buz McGrath of Unearth, and Kris Norris who just left Darkest Hour. Double Brutal differs from its precursor in that while the first disc is still originals inspired by Ahhnold's one-liners, there is a second disc of covers either from or relating to Ahhnold films. The covers include Metallica's Trapped Under Ice, Judas Priest's Hell Bent for Leather, and Megadeth's Killing is my Business...And Business is Good, all of which he covers phenomenally well, making them good and heavy while putting his own style into these classic songs. I think many of the songs from Total Brutal are stronger and more clever, and the joke is starting to run the end of its course. I do, however, think a good choice was made in the new voice of Ahhnold; he sounds gruffer and more serious than the first. Favorite track: Who told you you could eat my cookies?
\m/\m/\m/\m/ -- Four horns out of five for not quite living up to Total Brutal

#4. Lamb of God's Wrath (February 23, 2009) Epic, Roadrunner
This is actually the first I have ever really listened of Lamb of God (thanks to Zac for getting me into some heavier and louder stuff :)... ) and it is good. The album is kind of funky and aggressive at the same time and I love that. Guitarist Mark Morton said, "This one's really raw and real-sounding, from every angle, and we're celebrating imperfections on this record." If you haven't heard it, do it right now.
\m/\m/\m/\m/ -- Four horns out of five


#5. Dethklok's Dethalbum II ( September 29, 2009) Williams Street
Brendon Small is a badass. He does all the composing, lyrics, all vocals, all guitars, all keyboards, and all bass for the band. I saw Dethklok live recently (with Mastodon) and Small is an insane guitarist, plus a really talented voice actor. Metalocalypse is my favorite show by far \m/. However, like Austrian Death Machine's sequel, I felt like Dethalbum II fell short of the last one. The songs are a lot darker and heavier, which for me leads to them being harder to listen to and a little boring. There aren't as many catchy songs as there were on (the first) Dethalbum. Still, it's good. Bloodlines is probably my favorite track. And, of course as usual, all the guitar solos are insanely awesome.
\m/\m/\m/\m -- Three and a half horns out of five because Dethalbum (the first) set the bar way too high


Well, that's it. I can only come up with five albums to make the list this year... not that it was a bad year for metal, just slow, I suppose. Hopefully 2010 will bring plenty more face melting, ear bleeding, brutal metal.

Yours,
Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Everything but the Kitchen Sink Muffins

Recently I participated in a potluck with a whole bunch of non-vegans. For many of them, these muffins were to be their first vegan-baked-good experience as well as their first gluten-free-baked-good experience. Therefore I had to make the most brutally awesome, moist, and tasty muffins I could. I named them because of the fact that I took everything out of my cupboards and mixed it together into a single creation.

After the potluck I was told that these muffins did not taste like they were gluten-free or vegan. Success.

There are quite a few spices, so I think they are best made in the winter season.

Everything but the Kitchen Sink
(I used 1/2 cup soy flour, 1 cup oat flour, and 1/2 cup Gluten-Free flour from Bob's Red Mill... the last one is made mostly of garbanzo bean meal, which has a very distinct taste, so be careful how much of that kind you use... in anything. The oat flour is probably my favorite, and next time I might consider using just oat and soy...)
2 cups flour
1/2 - 3/4 tsp baking soda
1/4 - 1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1/4 tsp allspice
1/4 tsp ground cloves
1 cup vegan sugar
2 extra large or 3 small/medium well ripe bananas, peeled and mashed
1/2 cup vegan butter or vegetable oil
1/4 cup vegan milk plus 1 tsp apple cider vinegar
1 tsp vanilla
1 cup vegan chocolate chips
1 cup dried cranberries
1 cup crushed walnuts
anything else you like to put in muffins... shredded carrots might have been nice

Nothing in the Kitchen Sink
Preheat the oven t 350F. Mix the dry ingredients together. Mix the wet ingredients together. Mix the wet and dry mixtures together. If you're making a loaf, it probably will take about an hour+. For muffins, 40 mins. Soy flour, in case you've never used it before, browns significantly quicker than other flours. That's ok. The nuttiness really comes out nicely, so don't worry that your muffins are burning. They are done when a toothpick inserted into the center of one comes out clean.



All Hail Satan.

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Pancakes... Finally!

So I've finally decided to come up with a recipe for vegan pancakes. After making both the Brainless Banana Pancakes and the Apple Cinnamon Pancakes from Sarah Kramer's Vegan A-Go-Go, I created my own version of plain pancakes (since I didn't have any more apples or bananas). My taster confirmed that these were better than the fruity versions.

Ingredients:
1 cup flour (gluten-free all purpose flour works great)
2 tsp baking soda
1/4 cup sugar (a bit less is fine too... 2 Tbsp or so)
1/4 tsp salt
1 1/4 cup soy milk (or other vegan milk... 1 cup only if using gluten-free flour)

Indirections:
Mix the ingredients (dry first, then the milk) together in a bowl. Heat your non-stick frying pan up to medium-low heat. You can coat the pan with a little vegan butter to ensure they don't stick. Pour batter onto the pan. This recipe makes 2-3 big pancakes or about 4 littler ones. The pancakes will bubble and form little craters. Check the bottom to see when it's golden-brown. At that point you can flip it and brown the other side.

Enjoy them with vegan butter, syrup, jam, or fruit.

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Pi Day!

In honor of Pi Day tomorrow, Saturday, March 14th, 2009, I made an outrageously awesome vegan cherry Pi(e).

According to Wikipedia, the first Pi Day celebration was held at the San Francisco Exploratorium in 1988, with staff and public marching around one of its circular spaces, and then consuming fruit pies. On Pi Day, 2004, Daniel Tammet calculated and recited 22,514 decimal digits of pi.

And most importantly, the U.S. Congress has recognized March 14, 2009 as "National Pi Day".

Now since Pi Day, 3/14, is to honor and celebrate the fabulous mathematical constant π, here are some fun facts about the most popular irrational number.

Most of us know that π is equal to the ratio of a circle's circumference to its diameter. Similarly it is equal to the ratio of a circle's area to the square of its radius.

π is an irrational number (meaning it cannot be written as the ratio of two integers) and this was proven in 1761 by Johann Heinrich Lambert. Furthermore, π is transcendental. That means that there is no polynomial with rational coefficients of which π is a root. Ferdinand von Lindemann proved this in 1882.

For more about the constant and the holiday, visit the Official Pi Day website.

If you would like to make your own vegan cherry Pi(e) to celebrate such a glorious day, here's how...

Ingredients:
(This time I was lazy and I bought pre-made pie crusts from the freezer section at my local supermarket. Luckily, Marie Callendar's makes an accidentally vegan pie crust. You will need two. If you would like to make your own crust from scratch, see my previous cherry pie recipe.)
2 cans of pitted cherries
1 cup of vegan sugar
4 Tbsp agar agar flakes
1.5 tsp almond extract
1/2 tsp salt

Put it together:
Preheat the oven to 350F.
Remove the pie crusts from the freezer if you are using frozen ones.
Put the cherries and the liquid from one can and ONLY the cherries (not the liquid) from the other can into a mixing bowl.
Add the sugar, salt, almond extract, and agar agar flakes.
Mix it up.
Pour the cherry stuff into one of the crusts.
The other crust will be used to make your Pi decoration. Carefully cut out a "π" shape and lay it in the middle of your filling. For the rest of mine, I cut off the "sides" of the crust and laid that around the edges of my pie (see picture above).
Put it in the oven and bake for about 50 minutes or until the crust is browned and the filling is bubbly.

Happy Pi Day, everybody... seriously.

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Product Review: Nature's Path Hemp Plus Brownie Mix

While home recently for the holidays, my mom cleared her cupboards out into my car. Most of the stuff I ended up bringing to my dad, but some I kept for myself. One of these items was a boxed brownie mix from Nature's Path.

The ingredients, all of which are organic, include evaporated cane juice, whole wheat flour, dark cocoa powder, hemp seeds, soy flour, wheat bran, vital wheat gluten, a leavening agent (like baking soda), sea salt, and locust bean gum (a thickener). So, it's your basic brownie mix: flour, sugar, cocoa powder, salt, and baking soda.

The instructions are incredibly simple. Add 3 Tbsp of veggie oil (though I opted for canola oil since it's better for you) and 3/4 cup of cold water. Mix it all up, pour the batter into a pan, and bake for 40 minutes at 350F.

The box also gives you the option of making your hemp brownies moister by adding "2 organic eggs or egg substitute."

Into my mix, I threw about 1/2 cup of Ghirardelli semi-sweet chocolate chips and about 1/2 cup of chopped walnuts. I did not add egg substitute.

Now, before we get to eating them, let's learn some more about them. First of all, it should be said, since it is also very clearly stated on the box, this mix contains no THC. Instead, the hemp seeds are full of Omega fatty acids. Wikipedia says that hemp's amino acid profile is close to "complete" when compared to more common sources of proteins like meat, milk, eggs, and soy. Also the proportions of linoleic acid and alpha-linolenic acid in one tablespoon per day (15 ml) of hempseed oil easily provides human daily requirements for essential fatty acids. That's good news. Basically, hemp seed is good for you, and while brownies are not per se, these ones are a much better choice than a more traditional recipe.

According to the nutrition facts, each brownie (if you cut them into ten equal pieces, not counting the oil that you have to add in yourself, plus anything else like eggs, chocolate chips, nuts, or dried fruits) has 140 calories, 1.5 grams of fat, 31 grams of carbs with 20 of those grams coming from sugars, and 4 grams of protein. They are fairly low in sodium and contain no saturated or trans fats.

They sound good, but how do they taste? While baking, they didn't give my kitchen the usual yummy, chocolatey baking smell, but rather a sort of cardboard and dirt smell... Not too impressive. With a dry, crumbly consistency, these brownies are obviously eggless. They have an essence of wood flavor which is probably why they also smelled like dirt and cardboard. Even though the chocolate chips and walnuts try to make up for the bland, old taste of the cake part, they do not succeed. I will not be making Nature's Path Hemp Plus Brownies ever again, nor will I recommend them to anyone.

\m/ -- One horn out of five... EPIC FAIL

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Top Metal Albums of 2008

It's the end of the year, so time to review some music. Some really good metal came out this year... as well as some more mediocre music. Here is my list of the Top Metal Albums of 2008 :

#1 Metallica's Death Magnetic (September 12, 2008)
Yes, it's my favorite album of the year. I stand (almost) completely by my previous review. "Unforgiven III" still plays on repeat in my car. I still don't like "My Apocalypse" particularly much. The "(almost)" above is because of "The End of the Line" and "All Nightmare Long". Previously I said they were too long... Now I could stand with both songs going on longer. I love them. And seeing Metallica at the Forum on December 18th has strengthened this resolve even more. They played the first six tracks off Death Magnetic at the show and they were effing ownage. Again, way to go, guys. You rock.
\m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ -- Five horns out of five


#2 Apocalyptica's Worlds Collide (April 15, 2008)
I wish I could have more than one number one because Worlds Collide should be up there with Death Magnetic. With a shift from cello-driven Metallica covers to riff-driven heavy metal originals often now with vocals, Worlds Collide presents a completely new side of the Finnish quartet. Just one song on this album is a cover: "Helden" with vocals by Till Lindemann of Rammstein ( \m/ ) is a cover of Bowie's "Heroes" but translated into German, which makes it all the more badass. Three additional tracks on the album have vocals - something very different for Apocalyptica. And they're not just any vocals; Apocalyptica were able to work with Corey Taylor of Slipknot, Adam Gontier of Three Days Grace, and Cristina Scabbia of Lacuna Coil. Dave Lombardo of Slayer also plays drums on "Last Hope". It was a brilliant move on Apocalyptica's part to branch out and make an album that is slightly more mainstream in order to really break into the American market. It is still apparent in most of the songs that cellos are the main instruments, but a lot of the time they are very distorted and playing riffs that sound very much like how guitars would play. Anyway, even in previous albums, Apocalyptica have always been able to create an incredible variety of sounds from their cellos. Eicca, who does most of the song writing, continues to blow my mind. There are not words to express my adoration for this band, and there is not a single negative thing I would say about Worlds Collide. Favorite tracks: "Worlds Collide", "Helden", "Grace", "Last Hope", and "Ural". Second favorite tracks: the rest of them.
\m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ -- Six horns out of five... Nothing more to say

#3 Wednesday 13's Skeletons (April 29, 2008)
It was a tough call for me to not put this album higher on my list (but, yeah, it has to come after Apocalyptica). After having complained for a long time about Wednesday 13's lack of variety from song to song, album to album (Fang Bang and Transylvania 90210 sound exactly the same imho), and even band to band (Murderdolls to Wednesday 13), he's turned it around and given his fans something pretty much completely new. "Not Another Teenage Anthem" could have easily come from either of the previous two studio albums, as could "Gimme Gimme Bloodshed". But with "My Demise" and the title track "Skeletons", Poole delves deep into much more serious themes and personal struggles. They are certainly something you could slit your wrists too... just the way I like it. And putting these two songs back-to-back on the album is brilliant. I love the variation in vocals that Wednesday gives as well. Though I absolutely love his characteristic vocals, the deeper, clearer style he uses at times on this album was a really good decision. The thing I like most about Skeletons though, is that it is much more 'metal' than the previous two. It's heavy, dark, and really effing good.
\m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m -- Four and two-thirds horns out of five

#4 Nightmare Revisited (September 30, 2008)
Though certainly not a strictly 'metal' album, Nightmare Revisited is definitely in my top 5. My favorite tracks are Marilyn Manson's "This is Halloween", KoRn's "Kidnap the Sandy Claws" which is my current ring tone, and Rise Against's "Making Christmas". The rest of the tracks, although not rock or metal, are really good, and this album is really nice to put on while entertaining. It makes for good background music (which I know no band actually wants) but with a very wide variety of genres and styles, Nightmare Revisited literally has something for everyone and is one of the best cover albums I have heard.
\m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ -- Four horns out of five for KoRn's contributions alone


#5 Oomph!'s Monster! (August 22, 2008)
I love this album. It's good, (not so) clean industrial fun and far from their more electronic beginnings, which I don't much care for. It's much more guitar driven, but with that bit of electronica that is so characteristically Oomph!. My favorite tracks are "Labyrinth" and "Wach auf," both of which were released as singles.
\m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ -- Four horns out of five




#6 Slipknot's All Hope is Gone (August 20, 2008)
I've never been a huge Slipknot fan, but not because I was ever a hater; it's just that I never really listened to them. When this album came out, I figured I'd give them a try, and I was honestly pretty impressed by All Hope is Gone. There is a pretty broad range of songs on this album from the acoustic 'power ballad' "Snuff" to the heavier, faster, and rougher tracks like "Butcher's Hook". Obviously I can't compare this album to any previous ones, but I certainly enjoy this one. Some of it is a little stock, but it's still good. And anyway, it makes my top albums list...
\m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ -- Four horns out of five



#7 Testament's The Formation of Damnation (April 29, 2008)
Yay for Californian 80's thrash metal forefathers. Like Metallica, twenty-something years after their start, Testament are still kicking ass. This album is fast, heavy, and aggressive and shows off the band members' excellent songwriting abilities. The brutal title track is my favorite with clear influences from their old skool thrash beginnings. After nine years of nothing, The Formation of Damnation proves that Testament's still got it.
\m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \ -- Four and one-third horns out of five for Chuck Billy being awesome and old at the same time



#8 We Wish You a Metal Christmas and a Headbanging New Year (October 13, 2008)
I downloaded this album for fun while looking for Christmas music and was pleasantly surprised and highly amused. By far the heavy, thrashy "Silent Night" with (at times) *almost* death metal growling vocals, and a few wicked guitar solos is my favorite track. Ronnie James Dio and Tony Iommi's "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" is also a great, really heavy cover. Other artists include Dave Grohl, Lemmy, and Alice Cooper to name a few. Most of the songs on the album I would classify more as rock than metal, but it is good and entertaining.
\m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \ -- Four and one-third horns out of five for Chuck Billy's awesomeness again...


#9 HIM's Digital Verstile Doom: Live at the Orpheum Theater (April 29, 2008)
Of course I was incredibly stoked on the release of this live CD/DVD because I was at the show at the Orpheum where it was recorded. Though I used to be a die hard fan of the band, embarrassing enough as that is to admit, since the release of Venus Doom (2007), I've pretty much lost all enthusiasm for Ville Valo. At one point in the show, though this was cut from the DVD, Ville said something along the lines of "We used to just get drunk and sing about vampires" but now "we've gotten sober and much more serious." Well, Ville, even though it would seem you're trying to grow as a band, it was a poor choice to go in the direction you're trying to go. Venus Doom's first single, "Passion's Killing Floor", starts out with practically the same riff as "Wings of a Butterfly". I can see how he was trying to get heavier and more serious, but he just really missed the mark. Ville comes off as even more of a stuck up asshole than ever, and Venus Doom on the whole is just boring. The reason the Digital Versatile Doom CD and DVD make the list though is because of Linde and his mad guitar skillz. Somehow Ville agreed to let Linde play solos during a few of the songs, and it's a really refreshing change to what they usually do. The best is when Ville, in his usual pricky way, says "Don't worry - there's no solo in the next song... You're off the hook" and then laughs incredibly obnoxiously. It's unfortunate, but as long as Ville gets to be the lead man, he's going to hold back the rest of the band as musicians. They do put on a pretty good show though, and I enjoy watching the DVD very much.
\m/ \m/ \m/ -- Three horns out of five for Ville Valo being the biggest douche in the world

#10 Trivium's Shogun (September 30, 2008)
I certainly would not consider myself a Trivium fan. I only found out that they existed about two months ago. I do not own a copy of this album. In fact, I have only ever heard any of it while in the company of Z. However, there are two tracks on Shogun that I love (and can recognize), and therefore they still make my list... Plus, ten is such a classic number of items for a "top" list of any sort. "Kirisute Gomen" and "Down From The Sky" are awesome enough songs that the whole album (which I have 'heard' but not really listened to) gets the number 10 spot.

\m/ \m/ \m/ -- Three horns out of five since I don't even know what most of the album sounds like and I didn't bother listening to it before writing my review :)

Well, that'll do it. This was a great year for metal (at least for the bands I like :) ...) and I look forward to where 2009 will bring us. Until then, keep your horns high and your heads banging.

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Chocolate Chip Zucchini Muffins

Zucchini season equals zucchini bread season! I've been eating zucchinis with dinner almost every night and actually getting a bit tired of it. I cook it with a bit of olive oil and garlic on medium high heat until it just starts to soften. It's really good, but alas, too much of a good thing can be bad. A great way to use up zucchini and be able to keep it for a while is zucchini bread. You can make muffins and freeze them, taking them out as needed. The veggie itself doesn't really freeze well since it turns to mush, so don't do that. Do this instead. Bonus because it's "low fat."

Ingredients:
3 cups all-purpose flour
2 cups vegan sugar
1 tsp salt
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp nutmeg
1 1/2 tsp baking soda
2 tsp baking powder
3 replaced eggs
2 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup applesauce
3/4 cup soy milk plus 1 Tbsp apple cider vinegar
2 cups grated zucchini
1 cup vegan chocolate chips

Mix it up:
Preheat the oven to 350F. Combine the dry ingredients in a bowl (flour through baking powder). In a 1 cup measuring cup, put the apple cider vinegar. Top it off with soy milk and let it sit for a bit to get nice and curdley. Then in another bowl mix the eggs, applesauce, vanilla, and curdled milk. Grate your zucchini. Press as much water out of it as possible or your muffins will end up being a bit on the wet side and not in a good way... Now you can throw it all together: the dry mix, wet mix, zucchini shavings, and chocolate chips. Fill a greased muffin tin about three quarters full. If you fill the cups too full, the tops will expand and grow into each other, so don't do that. This recipe makes about 21 muffins. They should bake in 30 minutes.

This recipe as I said before is considered to be "low fat" since it doesn't have any butter/margarine/oil in it. If you find these muffins to be too dense for your liking, replace the applesauce with Earth Balance or other vegan butter substitute.

You can also add a cup of nuts to your batter. I find pecans to have a nice flavor that compliments this bread well. Walnuts work too.

Your Muffin Master,
Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Tempeh "Chicken" Strips

I friggin' love tempeh, but I only ever prepare it one way - from a recipe out of The Voluptuous Vegan. It's really good, but takes a while and a lot of ingredients. So today I decided to whip up some "chicken" strips out of tempeh instead.

For those of you who don't already know, tempeh is a fermented soy bean cake. I know, it sounds gross, but it's basically soybeans held together which you can slice, cube, or break up into individual beans again. When I buy tempeh, I always look for the pack with the least amount of black on it. The black part is a harmless mold that will grow as it sits. The longer you have your tempeh, the more black mold it will have. Don't worry though. It doesn't change the taste and you can eat it just fine. I just don't like the idea of it, so I opt for the tannest and least black block.

Anyway, now that you know how to buy it, here's something you can do with it.

Ingredients:
1 8oz pack of tempeh
1/2 cup soy sauce
1 Tbsp red chili paste (like Sambal or Sriracha)
1 cup flour
2 Tbsp corn starch or arrowroot
1 Tbsp dried thyme
water
oil for frying

How to:
Start by slicing up your tempeh into strips. You can do a bias cut to get wider strips or just cut them straight up and down if you feel more comfortable doing so. Mix up your marinade of soy sauce and chili paste, and toss the strips in making sure to cover each one.
Now make the coating for the tempeh by mixing up the flour, thickener, and thyme. Add water until you get a batter consistency to your liking (making sure not to let it get too thin... it will just run off the tempeh).
Heat up the oil in a frying pan. Pick up each strip shaking off excess marinade and coat them in the batter. Lay them in the frying pan. When the edges start to brown, turn it over to cook the other side.

And there you have it: "chicken" strips made from tempeh. They go great with sweet potato fries and a green salad.

Yours,
Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Vegan Black Bean Tostada Salad

Yes, finally a recipe again. Though it started as a place for me to post my vegan recipes, this blog has become fairly music centered in the last couple months. Anyway, I have a recipe that I threw together from things collected in the garden. We did a major harvest today, collecting the fruits of our labor and pruning everything back. (The zucchini really were overtaking the whole area.) So, here it is...

Begin with a bed of lettuce on your bowl or plate. Add a layer of lightly salted cooked brown rice topped with a bit of chopped cilantro. Then add a scoop of black beans right out of the can (drained). You can heat them if you like, but I prefer them at room temperature. On top of the beans you can throw some more cilantro. I love it, so I put lots on. Finally I put some roasted garlic salsa from Trader Joe's on the very top. If I had had fresh tomatoes and an avocado I would have used them instead of the salsa, though the salsa made a nice little dressing.

So that's it. Quick, easy, super fresh, and super good :) I'll be making again tomorrow too...

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Death Magnetic

I finally got my copy of the newest Metallica album in the mail and was able to listen to it in full from start to finish. Dare I write my own review and add to the barrage of Death Magnetic commentaries polluting metal blogs and websites? Yes. Yes, I do dare.

Well, first off, I normally read about six or seven metal-related blogs. Over the last two weeks, on average, eighty percent of the stories were about Metallica and Death Magnetic. Ok, that might be a slight exaggeration... but only 'slight'. MetalSucks.net even changed its name on September 12th to MetallicaSucks.net (the name, not the url) and they had every single writer of theirs review the album. From all that I have read (and I've read a lot), the conclusion seems to be that the album is good but the mixing was shitty. There are comments about the drums being pushed too hard and compressed too much, the vocals sounding robotic (from the editing, not James's actual singing), and it being too 'loud' in general. I read all this before I had ever even heard the album.

Now I've heard it, and all I can say is that I have no idea what these reviews are taking about. I guess I don't know enough about music or metal or mixing or what tracks 'should' sound like, but I picked up on none of what I read. Oh well. Ignorance is bliss because I love this album.

First off, the CD case is really cool. It's 3D and made mostly of paper (yay for recyclable materials!!). The only plastic they do use explicitly says on it that it is 100% recycled and 35% post consumer materials. Thank you for doing that, Metallica. We vegan and environmentalist metalheads love you for it. The layout of the case is pretty rad. I opened it and looked through the whole book before even finding the CD itself. It certainly made things more fun and exciting without even hearing any music :P

Anyway, on to the music. Like I said before, I loved it. Though annoyingly long at times ("End of the Line" and "All Nightmare Long" should have ended around 6:00, but both are longer than 7:45), overall I thought it was great. The average song length is exactly 7:28 with the longest running three seconds short of ten minutes and the shortest 5:01. For someone like me with ADD when it comes to long songs, seven and a half minutes each seems way too long for ten songs. Other than the two aforementioned, the song length turned out to be fine. In fact, "Suicide and Redemption" is my favorite track on the whole album. It's ten minutes of instrumental awesomeness that I could listen to over and over and over again. Way to go on this one, guys. Seriously.

My least favorite song (after having listened through only once) is "My Apocalypse" but it's the shortest and shows up at the end. This means I can just stop listening to the album one track before it's really over or let them go out without a bang... It is also in this track where I can kind of hear where some of the complaints about the mixing come from. It does seem to get a bit loud and dirty (in a bad way) at times.

The Unforgiven III was a great song imho. I love the strings. I had to pick up my cello halfway through and play along. My favorite lyric of the album as of yet is "How can I be lost if I've got nowhere to go?". I'm a big fan of "The Unforgiven" and "The Unforgiven II", and I thought that "The Unforgiven III" is a fantastic end to a fantastic trilogy.

Anyway, so that's my review of the album. As for the mixing, I didn't hear much wrong with it and I am grateful for that after everything I read. I'm going to go listen to it again. And probably again.

\m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ Five horns out of five for Death Magnetic.

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Chocolate Patty Pan Squash Bread

It's been a while since I last posted. I've been crazy busy with work and school and just haven't had the time to cook and bake like I used to. Yesterday, however, a co-worker brought in some patty pan squashes from her yard since they haven't been able to eat them as fast as they are growing. I took two home, and here's what we did with one of them...

Ingredients:
3 cups all-purpose flour
2 cups sugar
1 tsp salt
1 tsp nutmeg
1 tsp cinnamon
1.5 tsp baking soda
2 tsp baking powder
3 'eggs' made from Egg Replacer
1/2 cup Earth Balance or other vegan 'butter'
3/4 cup soymilk + 1 tsp apple cider vinegar
2 tsp vanilla
2 cups chopped patty pan squash
3/4 cup pecans
1 cup vegan chocolate chips

Do it:
Heat the oven to 350F. Mix all the dry ingredients in a bowl. In another bowl, prepare the 'eggs'. Curdle the soymilk by putting the apple cider vinegar into a 1 cup measuring cup and then add the 3/4 cup of soymilk. Melt the butter in the microwave or by letting it stand out for a while before being used. Mix all the wet ingredients together well. Add the squash, nuts, chocolate chips, and wet ingredients into the dry. Mix well. Grease two loaf pans or two 9" cake pans. Split the bread mix evenly between the two. Bake for about an hour or until a toothpick inserted into the center of the bread comes out clean.

This twist on zucchini bread is so ridiculously good. Picky kids, non-vegetable eaters, and pretty much everyone will enjoy this sweet, but somewhat healthful, treat.

Your squash master,
Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Peanut Butter and Banana Oatmeal Cookies

While browsing my pantry today, I discovered an overly ripe banana. I rarely will eat bananas in such condition plain, so I decided to bake something of it. I checked online for recipes that sounded interesting, but all I found that I even sort of liked was 'Sugar-Free Peanut Butter Banana Oatmeal Cookies'... Nope, sorry, no sugar-free cookies in my kitchen! They didn't even call for vegan butter! Here is my (better) sugar-full version :)

Ingredients:
2 very ripe bananas, mashed well
1/4 cup peanut butter
2 1/2 cups oats
1/2 cup flour
1/4 cup Earth Balance (or other vegan butter)
1/4 cup maple syrup
1/4 cup Florida Crystals (or other vegan sugar)
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 tsp cinnamon

Instructions:
Preheat the oven to 350F. As per usual, mix the wet ingredients together and separately mix the dry ones together. Then mix them all in to each other :)
Bake for about 15 minutes or until golden brown.

Enjoy the peanut buttery bananay oatmealy deliciousness!

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Apocalyptica: Round 2

Last night's show at the Ventura Theatre in Ventura, CA was the beginning of the end of Apocalyptica's Worlds Collide tour in the United States. The venue claims to hold 1200, but the balcony was closed off, and the theater was by no means full. However, the crowd was into it, the room was hot, and the performance was spectacular... which is, of course, to be expected.

When we saw them last at the Roxy in Hollywood back in mid-April, Johnny Andrews joined the cellists to sing I'm Not Jesus and I Don't Care both of which he co-wrote. Well, Apocalyptica clearly realized what a mistake they had made by allowing Johnny to sing (I wanted to boo him off the stage), and after just a few shows, they bumped him out and brought in Toryn Green of Fuel to sing... This was probably the best decision they have ever made :P

[I Don't Care]

Toryn sang Andrews's two songs and was also amazing enough to sing Helden, the German version of David Bowie's Heroes, which, on the Worlds Collide album, features Till Lindemann of Rammstein. At the last show I was holding my breath the entire time hoping they'd play Helden, but alas, I went home without having experienced it. Not so this time. And not only did they play it, but Toryn actually sang the first part in German. It was awesome...

And also for your viewing enjoyment, Nothing Else Matters, the last song of the night.

It's weird seeing a band twice on the same tour at shows just over a month apart. I certainly wasn't as giddy this time as I was last time. I went in with completely different expectations, and there was almost a sense of it being anti-climactic, like, been there, seen that. There was none of the surreality that I experienced last time. Rather than feeling almost star-struck, I was able to really listen and rock out and admire their insane abilities as musicians. I appreciate having seen them twice for sure. I got a lot more out of it instead of just screaming and flipping out.

Indeed, good times were had by all.

\m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ -- Five horns out of five for Apocalyptica and the entirety of their Worlds Collide tour

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Banana Spring Roll Madness

When most people hear 'vegan' they think veggies, tofu, healthful foods in general. But being free of animal products in no way necessitates health. I give you Banana Spring Rolls. Smothered in caramel and deep fried, this glorious banana treat will leave you sugared up and wanting more. Not for the faint of heart.

This recipe only makes four, so you'd better double it just to be safe.

Ingredients:
1 very ripe large banana
2 Tbsp Earth Balance or other vegan butter substitute
3 Tbsp Florida Crystals or other vegan sugar
1 Tbsp water
cinnamon
safflower oil for deep frying
4 spring roll wrappers (egg roll wrappers are not what you want to use. They are thicker and made of eggs, which are not vegan)

The fun part:
Melt the 'butter' in a saucepan. Add the sugar and keep stirring. When it is bubbling nicely, add about a tablespoon of water. Careful - it will spit at you. When it starts to caramelize you can slice the banana into the sauce. Remove from the heat. Add a dash of cinnamon and stir it all up good.

In a frying pan, warm the oil for deep frying. If the oil smokes, remove it from the heat for a couple minutes to let it cool down. Keep the heat on the low end of medium.

Now take one spring roll wrapper sheet and place it in front of you so it looks like a diamond. Spoon some banana slices across the middle about three inches in from each of the side corners. Fold the side corners in on top of the banana. Fold the bottom side up. Then begin rolling from the bottom to the top.

Place the roll in the oil and let it go. When the bottom side is sufficiently golden brown, flip it and brown the top. Remove it from the oil and place it on a plate. I know it's tempting, but don't eat it just yet because it's still too hot. Make the rest of the spring rolls instead.

When they have cooled, enjoy them with the leftover caramel sauce from the pan on top as well as with some soy ice cream and/or soy whipped cream.

I have no idea how many calories or grams of fat are in one roll, but my motto is 'don't ask, don't tell' :)

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Cellos on the Rise

It has been exactly a month since I saw Apocalyptica live at the Roxy in Hollywood at the second show of their Worlds Collide album tour, and in just four more days I'll see them again at a last minute added show in Ventura - the second to last before they head back to Europe.

[my favorite - Apocalyptica's cover of Metallica's Nothing Else Matters]

I read today that Apocalyptica's sixth album Worlds Collide, released in the United States on April 15th 2008, debuted at #59 on the Billboard 200 charts, selling 11000 copies in the first week. Not too shabby for a band about which MetalSucks asks "Are [they] really that big?". The album, according to Wikipedia, peaked at #8 in Finland and #10 in Germany. And the "I'm not Jesus" single which peaked at #7 on the Hot Mainstream Rock Track single charts currently stands at #8 and has been on there for 13 weeks. I actually don't like the song at all. I feel like it's too mainstreamed and not very representative of what Apocalyptica really is. Anyway, the album now stands at #134 in its third week after being released. Apparently everyone who wanted to buy the album did so as soon as it was available.

For anyone who doesn't know, Apocalyptica is actually a really awesome band. They originally gained popularity by playing covers of Metallica and have since covered Sepultura, Slayer, Rammstein, and Pantera. Their biggest crowd-pleasers are probably Metallica's Nothing Else Matters and Edvard Grieg's In the Hall of the Mountain King. Apocalyptica brings something really awesome and unique to the metal scene. They are classically trained and ridiculously talented cellists who rock the **** out of their strings. Anyone who says that a cello (or any other stringed instrument) can't or shouldn't be used to play metal has obviously never heard of Apocalyptica... or Metallica's S&M.

I think people would actually be surprised to find out that cellos are used in a lot of popular music to give it a rich, unique sound. Some songs bettered by cellos include Eleanor Rigby by The Beatles, Something in the Way by Nirvana, Wonderwall by Oasis, Mad World by Gary Jules, and Aerials by System of a Down.

And strings aren't just used to support guitars and basses anymore. String metal all on it's own is finding it's place in this world. Rasputina is a pair of girl cellists who play rocky, cabaret-y music. Judgment Day are two brothers who play metal with their violin and cello. Break of Reality (a band I just found while researching for this blog) consists of three cellists and a drummer. They are currently playing colleges, but are really good from what I see, so maybe we'll be hearing something more from them in the near future.

[Break of Reality's cover of Slayer's Mandatory Suicide]

So I guess the point of all this is that the cello is cool. And people who play the cello are hot. So if you haven't already, give cello rock / string metal a chance.

You won't regret it.

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

Vegan Pesto

I have been a long-time lover of pesto and basil in general, but I have never attempted to make my own pesto from scratch... until now. I think it turned out really well for a first-timer.

Ingredients:
1 cup of basil leaves, tightly packed, stems removed
5 Tbsp of extra virgin olive oil
2 cloves of garlic
1/2 tsp of salt
1 Tbsp water

To make it:
Throw everything into a food processor and let it go.
Add it to pasta, as a spread on sandwiches, as a sauce for extra firm tofu, or wherever else you see fit.


"OK, hold on. So, you're telling me you put these guys in boiling water and they shrink and they turn red and they die?... That is the most metal thing I have ever heard in my whole life."

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/

DIY: Wheatgrass Juice

Wheatgrass juice is a fairly popular thing among those who fast, try fad diets, or eat whatever the most recent issue of some health magazine says is good. At Blenders in the Grass, the local south central coast smoothie joint, they advertise their wheatgrass shots as being equivalent to 2.5 pounds of vegetables. Honestly, I have no idea what that even means and it's probably, on most fronts, a lie. Even though a lot of crazy people swear by it, they aren't completely wrong: there are some health benefits to wheatgrass juice.

Wheatgrass itself is made up mostly of chlorophyll. This green pigment has been compared to hemoglobin and hence it is claimed that wheatgrass helps blood flow and digestion. Though no scientific evidence proves these claims, it's always good to eat more veggies for the nutrients, minerals, and fiber they provide. Per ounce of wheatgrass juice, there are 20 calories, no fat, 3 grams of carbohydrates, and 2 grams of protein.


I actually like the taste of wheatgrass. It reminds of summertime and running around in the sprinklers on a freshly mowed lawn. If you don't like the taste of it, I say don't bother. The nutrients that one ounce of wheatgrass provides is essentially the same as an ounce of any other dark green, leafy vegetable. But if you do like the taste or believe that wheatgrass is magic, then go for it.



Growing

You can find wheat berries at your local health food or whole food store. They aren't too expensive and they grow quickly. Growing is my favorite part, but if you are too impatient you can buy already grown wheatgrass. Check out your farmers market or even a local pet store.

What you'll need:
a flat, tray, or other low-walled container for growing
enough seeds to spread across your tray
soil
water
a bowl

Soak the berries in a bowl filled with water for 6-8 hours. You don't want them to soak too long because they will start to ferment after a while. Some people suggest doing it overnight, but I think no more than 8 hours is good.
Prepare your flat by spreading about an inch deep of soil across it. Drain the seeds and spread them over the dirt. Cover them with a thin layer of soil and water it. Cover the flat with damp newspaper or paper towels.
For the first three days or so, keep the paper towels over the flat and keep it damp. When the grass starts to poke through the top of the soil, you can remove the cover.
Keep your soil damp while the grass grows.

Harvesting

You will need:
Scissors
A bowl

When the grass is about 6-8 inches in height, just trim it at the base with a pair of scissors. You can collect the grass in a bowl.

Juicing

You will need:
A juicer - hand-cranked or electric

Put the grass in the juicer following your juicer's instructions. My flat is made to sit on a windowsill and is about 5" deep and 24" long. The entire flat worth of grass yields only one shot (1.5 - 2oz) of juice.

So, is it worth it to grow, harvest, and juice your own grass instead of buying a shot for about $3 each time? Yes and no. A juicer is expensive. If you are only buying one for wheatgrass... I don't know. It also takes a long time to produce just one shot - a week to grow your grass, a couple minutes to harvest, and about a half hour to clean the juicer. On the other hand, I find it quite fun to grow plants, especially for food. Living in an apartment with no green space accessible to me, wheatgrass is a really great thing because it grows quickly and needs no direct sunlight. Plus, like I said before, I actually like the taste of a wheatgrass shot. Will I continue growing for myself? Probably not. But it's a fun project to do every once in a while.

Spawn of Seitan
\m/ ^_^ \m/